


One Life to Live

by Purple_Panic



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Smut, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-19
Updated: 2013-09-19
Packaged: 2017-12-27 01:26:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/972707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purple_Panic/pseuds/Purple_Panic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor loves her more than anything, but his heart breaks every time he catches her looking out the window for a blue box containing a Doctor that isn't him. How can he make her see that they are one and the same?</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Life to Live

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all. This is my first fic contribution to the Doctor Who fandom. I hope I do the characters justice!

It wasn’t what he had expected.

After all he had been through…after all they had been through, he thought she would have accepted him by now, made peace with the fact that he was still him, still the Doctor, just…not.

He supposed he was still adjusting just as much as she was. This new body, a strange hybrid of human and time lord, was so confusing. He had to sleep more in this body that seemed to fatigue so easily, but not as much as Rose. She could sleep eight, and sometimes even ten hours a night, and he was satisfied with four to five. That left him plenty of time to dwell on the other alien aspects of being human: the overwhelming intensity of his emotions.

He hadn’t expected to feel so much, that first day on the beach in this alternate universe. Kissing her had been glorious, a rush unlike any he had ever experienced. Rose was a passionate creature, pouring her very soul into that kiss as she had held on to him so desperately.

He hadn’t expected it to hurt so much either when she had tore her mouth away, her expression pained as she watched the Tardis disappear for the last time. The other Doctor, her Doctor had left her, and though he shared his memories, his personality, and his love for Rose, he was still a clone, a cast of the original, and in that moment, she had made him feel like second best; a consolation prize as her true desire left her behind. 

The feeling had left him colder and emptier than the frigid Norwegian wind tearing across Bad Wolf Bay, the gray sky reflecting his mood. But he managed to reason with himself through the raw emotion and understand that Rose would need time to adjust. She had only just been reunited with her Doctor, only to lose him again, left instead with a man that loved her just as much, had shared the experiences of everything they had been through, only in his chest beat a single heart instead of two.

His spirits had been lifted on the way home when they had piled into the car for the long drive home. Pete and Jackie prattled on endlessly, asking question after question as to how he came to exist, where he planned to stay and if he would be interested in a full time position at Torchwood.

He couldn’t help the joy that swelled inside him when Rose quietly took his hand in hers and stated that he wouldn’t need a room in the Tyler mansion. He would be moving in to her flat. But even then, he could see her gaze directed out the window, scanning the sky for any sign of a flying blue box.

XXXXX

Settling in hadn’t been so bad. Rose also worked at Torchwood and they soon fell into a routine. Her flat was surprisingly spacious with three bedrooms and a fantastic view of the Thames, (which probably had something to do with Pete’s incredible wealth and prestige.) 

While he didn’t always see her during the day, they often spent evenings together. She taught him how to cook and he showed her his plans of growing a new Tardis, his heart skipping a beat at the way her face lit up in a dazzling smile.

They did inane, earthly, everyday things together, yet talked of all the amazing things they had done in a different place and time. Every day she seemed to warm up to him a little more, but there was still something different about the way she looked at him. Sometimes she would lose herself and slip back into how they used to be together, flirting and laughing and making him think that maybe she had finally given him the whole of her heart. But then he would catch her looking wistfully at the sky and he would know that she still longed for the man that was a dimension away.

As frustrated as he was, he wouldn’t rush things. He would let Rose come to her own conclusion in her own time, but living under the same roof with her made things agonizing.

Along with human emotions came equally intense hormonal urges. Never had he wanted something, someone so much. Everything about her was suddenly so…provocative.

Watching her eat was torture. The way her lips wrapped around the tines of her fork, and her tongue darting out to catch a stray crumb, made him ache. On the rare occasion she wore shorts, he couldn’t keep his eyes off her pale, lean legs. Once, she made the mistake of coming out of the shower in a jumper with no bra beneath. Her nipples were prominent beneath the thin material and his fingers itched to touch them, imagining the sounds she would make as he licked the remaining water droplets from her skin.

He was constantly at war with himself. He was partly ashamed for having such consistently lecherous thoughts. At the same time he longed to give in to them, to press her up against the nearest wall and give her a good snogging. Maybe then she would finally realize that it was useless to pine for another Doctor when there was a perfectly willing one right in front of her.

His time lord self, on the numerous occasions he had felt a flair of desire for his blonde companion, had quickly and efficiently dismissed the thoughts and gone on functioning as normal. However, even his nine hundred and six years of life experience could not aid him in making his human body obey. He wanted her constantly and was finding it harder and harder to be content with being just her flatmate. When he had promised her on the beaches of Norway that he would spend the one life he had to live with her, this hadn’t been what he had in mind.

XXXXX

They had been living together for just over three months now and life was, well…normal. Their new Tardis was in the beginning stages of growth but it would be some time before it would be ready to travel. There have been no attempted invasions, no Daleks, no Cybermen. If it wasn’t for Rose, life would be downright boring.

But even in the simplicities of domestic living, he found joy in being near her. Tonight they shared the kitchen, he frying up some chicken while Rose sliced tomatoes for a salad. Their banter was playful, their mood light, and he told her of some of the places he would like to take her once their Tardis is ready.

Her hazel eyes had gone all dreamy as she smiled. 

“I miss it out there, Doctor,” she said. “After traveling across the whole of time and space, the Earth is just too small for me now.”

They sat on the couch and watch the telly as they ate. Apparently Rose found the show funny, but he was much more interested in stealing glances at her rather than the screen. He loved it when she laughed, how she lit up, how beautiful she was. It reminded him of the first trip they took together to the distant future. 

“Have I got something on my face?” she asked, snapping him out of his trance. It’s clear she had caught him staring.

“No, you face is…fine, just brilliant,” he replied, cheeks warming at the fact that he’s been caught gawking. Smoothly, he covered it up by drawing one of her feet into his lap and began to press his thumbs into her tender arch. “You just look like you were in need of a foot rub.”

She moaned softly, eyes drifting closed as she breathed, “God, that’s good.” Instantly, the Doctor’s mind provided several scenarios in which she could moan those very same words, but for entirely different reasons. He carefully guided her foot away from the tent forming in his pants, hoping she wouldn’t notice how she was affecting him.

“In all honesty,” he said, as his fingers smoothed over her pink painted toes, “I was just remembering the way you looked the first time I showed you the stars, how happy you were looking down on earth in the year five billion.”

“Until you told me my planet was about to be destroyed, yeah?” she laughed before sighing a little as his hands expertly worked into her heel. 

He smiled, debating whether to say what’s on his mind. Since they’ve moved in together, they have had few intimate moments. They never breech the topic that they have both proclaimed to be in love with each other, or at least she had said it to his other self. He hoped this wouldn’t make things more awkward and drive her further away, but he was tired of the big fat elephant in the room. 

“But even then, when I told you what was going to happen, I could see the awe and wonder in your eyes. It was like an inner light went on in you, Rose. You were so beautiful in that moment.”

She smiled a brilliant, genuine smile, but almost as soon as it had come, it faded away, her brow drawn into a frown as she regarded him.

“Sometimes I forget that there are two of you, that you have all his memories but never experienced those events.”

The Doctor tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach and swallowed down the hurt her words unintentionally caused.

“But I did experience them, Rose. I am him, and he is me. We’re the same, but I am here now, with you, and he is never coming back.”

“I know,” she bit back, an edge of anger in her voice. “I heard him say it, just like you did. The pathway between dimensions is closed for good and I will never see him again.”

He didn’t want to fight, really he didn’t. But he couldn’t help himself. All his pent up frustrations from the last few months bubbled to the surface and he let slip from his mouth what he had privately thought so many times. “Then why are you waiting for him?”

A stunned pause, Rose’s eyes wide, her full lips pursed into a tight little ‘o’ before she managed, “I’m not.”

“You are!” he cried in frustration, unceremoniously dropping her foot in his lap to run a hand through his already disheveled hair. “I see you looking at the sky, always looking for a blue box. It’s like you’re holding your breath, waiting for him to come back so you can start living. But I’m telling you, I’m here now and I love you and I’m willing to spend the one life I have with you. I thought that’s what you wanted.”

Silence, stretching longer and longer between them, his words hanging in the air. She looked at him and he looked at her, piercing brown to stunning hazel. He began to wonder if she would say anything at all.

“I…”

Her mobile rang, chirping an annoying little tune and cutting short whatever she was about to say.

“Don’t answer it,” he pleaded. This was their moment where perhaps they could work everything out, where she would finally accept him as her doctor. Or perhaps this was where things all fell apart and his dreams of a life with Rose crumbled to dust.

Her eyes glanced at the screen seeing the name that lit up on my screen.

“It’s my mum,” she said. “I have to take this.”

“Don’t. It can wait.”

She picked up the phone and accepted the call, dragging her feet of his lap so she could stand and exit the room. He heard her talking in soft tones from the hallway and couldn’t help the bitterness that welled up inside him. Did he really mean so little to her that she would take a call during their most pivotal moment? At the moment he was thankful he only had one heart to break. He didn’t think he could stand the pain of having two.

She reentered the room, keys in hand. “Mum’s car won’t start and she’s stranded cross town. I have to take her home and I’ll come right back.”

“Rose, please…”

“Right back,” she reaffirmed softly before grabbing her coat and heading out the door.

As he heard her footsteps echoing down the hall, he rested his elbows on his knees and held his head in his hands. Suddenly he was utterly exhausted, mentally, physically and emotionally. He wasn’t going to wait up for her. He was going to bed.

XXXXX

As it turned out, falling asleep was a lot harder than he had planned. No matter how long he stared at the ceiling, sleep continued to allude him. He finally gave up and switched on the light, slipping on his glasses and settling back into the pillows with his latest book. Reading was a new habit he had picked up in this universe. Without a Tardis allowing him to travel the universe, he had a lot of time on his hands. But since this was a whole new dimension with a whole new history, he spent much of his time reading, learning as much as he could about his new home. However, tonight his attempts at learning were fruitless. His mind continued to circle back to Rose. She should have been home by now. 

He had only managed to read three pages when he heard the front door open. A glance at the clock on his nightstand told him it had been three hours since she’d left.

He usually slept with his door closed, but for whatever reason, he had left it open tonight, and though he did not look up from his book, he could sense her in the doorway, watching him.

He pretended not to notice her although he was fairly certain she knew he knew she was there. Seconds stretched into minutes and he began to think she would walk away without saying anything at all, but then the silence was shattered as she softly said his name, “Doctor.”

“Hello, Rose,” he replied without looking up from his book.

She cleared her throat, and fidgeted a bit. She obviously knew he was cross with her. “I didn’t mean to be gone so long. Mum was-”

“Its fine,” he said quietly, cutting her off as he turned the page. “I was just going to bed.”

She huffed softly in frustration. “Doctor, don’t be angry-”

She should have just walked away, but now she’d done it. Something inside him snapped.

“Don’t be angry? What would you like me to be, Rose? What do you want from me?” he demanded, closing his book with a snap and tossing in aside. “I come to this world for the purpose of being with you and sometimes you treat me like a stranger!”

“That’s not true,” Rose argued, crossing her arms defensively over her chest.

“No? At best you treat me like your mate. At worst, you treat me like an imposter, some stranger with the Doctor’s face. I see you looking out the window at the sky, waiting for him. But he is me, Rose and I’m here! Why can’t you see that?”

For a moment, Rose looked as if she’d been slapped, but then her eyes narrowed.

“You may not see the differences, Doctor, but I do. You’re quite the proficient typist now. I’m sure that’s a skill acquired from Donna. Sometimes the things you say, the way you laugh, the foods you eat, even your mannerisms…there’s traces of her all over you! So I’m sorry that it’s taken me a while to adjust to a man who essentially is the child of the man I loved and another woman!”

Rose’s voice wavered, but it didn’t crack, and though she was strong and wouldn’t let him see her cry, he could see that her eyes were shiny with unshed tears.

Her words stunned him. He had honestly noticed no differences in himself. He was who he was, and he was the Doctor, wasn’t he? He had never stopped to think that the metacrisis had changed his personality profoundly. He felt the same. He looked the same. That had been enough for him.

But apparently Rose had been far more observant and had picked up on subtleties that he had not. He supposed it made sense if Donna’s DNA was indeed interwoven with his. He wanted to be the same Doctor, her Doctor, but it appeared he was different enough that coping was proving to be difficult for her. He had been so caught up in the dream of finally having a relationship with Rose, he had been insensitive to the fact that things would be different in this new body and in this new world. 

“Rose,” he said softly, but she turned on her heel and was gone. A moment later he heard the door to her room shut firmly.

He wanted to go after her, but didn’t have the foggiest notion of what to say. He could tell that his angry outburst had hurt her, but her words had also wounded him. He would gladly change for her, but didn’t know how to be anything but himself, which apparently was a snarky and overly confident time lord spliced with an equally snarky, strong willed human secretary. If he was going to inherit some of her qualities, he could have at least gotten her ginger hair. Ten regenerations, and still never a ginger.

He flopped down into the cool embrace of his pillow, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. This was a bloody mess and he didn’t know how to make it right. Sure he could go apologize, but his words wouldn’t be the Doctor’s. They would come from the Doctor/Donna metacrisis, which is what she saw him as now, he was sure.

Without opening his eyes, he reached out and fumbled for the lamp switch on his night stand, plunging the room into darkness. Maybe things would be better tomorrow, but somehow he couldn’t bring himself to feel optimistic.

XXXXX

Rose was already gone by the time he awoke the next morning. She had been working long hours at Torchwood recently so the Doctor wasn’t particularly surprised. In fact, it was something of a relief to not see her because he still didn’t know what to say to her. 

Their conversation replayed over and over in his mind, eating away at him. After the realization that he was in fact different in many ways from the original Doctor, he couldn’t help feeling somewhat inadequate. He did, after all, only have one human life, and one beating heart. He had thought that was what Rose wanted, what she needed. Now, he wasn’t so sure.

He continuously fretted over the ways he might be different from his counterpart. Even as he opened the fridge and pondered what to eat for breakfast, he couldn’t hope but wonder if it was a choice being made by the Doctor in him or the Donna.

He couldn’t go on like this, doubting every word, thought and action. He knew the solution was simple. Whatever crazy combination of human and time lord he had become, would be what he continued to be. He could be nothing else. Rose could either accept it and fall in love all over again with the new him, or not.

He sincerely hoped that Rose would come to love him in the end, because if not, he didn’t think he could take the pain of experiencing the flood of human emotions that came with a broken heart.

He usually looked forward to going to work because not only did it mean seeing Rose, but Torchwood always provided him with stimulating dilemmas like recreating alien technology, decrypting alien languages and occasionally saving the world from total destruction. However, he couldn’t help a sense of dread as he slipped into his blue pinstripe suit. If he did see Rose today, would things be weird? Would she pretend that nothing had happened? Would she ignore him? He longed for the days on the Tardis when he was an alien, she was his human companion, and together they traveled the universe together with relatively few complications between them.

He never knew being human would be so hard.

XXXXX

The next few days were uneventful, probably because he managed to avoid seeing Rose even once. She would be at work when he awoke, and either in her room or out somewhere when he got home. He either stayed at Torchwood late or spent hours working on their new Tardis…well, he had thought it would be theirs, now he wasn’t so sure.

He threw himself into his work like never before, exhausting himself so that by the time he got into bed, he had no energy left to lie awake and worry over how the thing he loved most was slipping away from him. He refused to let himself dwell on the fact that maybe the reason she wasn’t home some nights was that maybe she was out seeing someone else. Maybe she had started something up again with Mickey or had met someone new. Maybe-

And that was where he fiercely put an end to his mind running away with what ifs and maybes. He knew he was being ridiculous. He should just go talk to her. After all, she couldn’t fall in love with the new him if they were never together. But he was still getting used to being human and the intensity of the emotions that came with it. He loved her hated her, was saddened by her and lusted after her all at once. Caught in his own tangled web of emotions, he needed time to sort out what he would say to her when he finally saw her.

He missed her terribly, and five days of her absence in his life seemed like an eternity. There were traces of her everywhere, her dirty bowl in the kitchen sink, her comb on the bathroom counter with a blonde hair still in it, her shoes by the front door. He was surrounded by her yet deprived of her. He missed cuddling on the couch and cooking together and giggling together like idiots over some privet joke. He missed the way she smiled with the tip of her tongue caught between her teeth, the way her wet hair smelled after a shampoo, the way she bit her lip in concentration as she painted her toe nails on the couch. They may share a flat, but he was still incredibly lonely.

The fifth day passed like all the rest. No Rose at home. No Rose at work. His days were empty, merely a progression of tasks. Time was not wibbly wobbly, but passed excruciatingly slowly in the correct order. He stayed late at Torchwood trying to repair an alien hard drive so they could extract its contents, then went home, showered, and went to bed. He had seen the light on under Rose’s door and had ached to go talk to her. He figured she would initiate contact when she was good and ready, unless of course she was waiting for him to do it and in that case they were both in trouble because he still didn’t know what to say.

The shower felt wonderful, the hot spray easing his tired muscles but doing little to cleanse his troubled mind. His body still craved her no matter how much he tried to push his need to the back of his mind. The shower was his refuge, and since they had moved in together, it was the place he went when his desire grew too strong and he finally allowed himself to give in, stroking himself to thoughts of her and all the things he longed to do if she would only let him. 

Tonight was not one of those nights where he gave in to the demands of his body. He simply didn’t have any energy left for such activities. Instead he just stood for a while, leaning tiredly against the cool tile as hot water and steam enveloped him. When the water started to run cold, he scrubbed down and stepped out of the shower, barely staying awake long enough to towel off, brush his teeth, and pull on a pair of pajama bottoms before collapsing into bed. He couldn’t recall ever sleeping so soundly or so deeply in his whole life.

XXXXX

His sleep was dreamless, a dark abyss, and when he finally awoke the next morning, it was a slow surfacing through the gray layers of semi consciousness. 

But as he became more aware, he couldn’t help but notice the sound of a double heartbeat, a four beat pulse thrumming through him.

For an instant, he thought that he had awakened in the Tardis, and this whole business of being human had just been a dream. But then he glanced down his body and was able to see a small hand curled possessively over his hip, her nails painted the familiar pink shade she had been favoring lately. 

He didn’t have two hearts after all, but could feel Rose’s along side his, beating in time. She was pressed intimately to his back, every breath pushing the softness of her breasts to him. One leg was slung carelessly over his and her breath blew gently on the back of his neck.

Rose was here, in his bed. For a moment his brain short-circuited as he tried desperately to remember just how she had gotten there. Weren’t they fighting? He hadn’t seen her in nearly a week and now here she was, snuggled up against him more intimately that she had ever been. He remembered being exhausted and going to bed, then after that, nothing. She must have crept in after he was asleep. 

He loved the feeling of being wrapped up in her like this, limbs entangled and body pressed to body. His fingers suddenly itched to touch her, to roll her over on her back and awaken her with a showering of kisses on every inch of her unexplored body. He was still clad in nothing more than a pair of flannel pajama bottoms, and though he could tell there was some sort of material separating Rose’s skin from his, her legs were undoubtedly bare. Before he realized what he was doing, his hand was on the thigh that was thrown over his, caressing the silken skin softly before sliding higher, higher, curious to see just where it would meet the barrier of clothing.

Rose let out a sleepy sound that was suspiciously close to a hum of pleasure and he whipped his hand aware as if he’d been burned. This was wrong, so very wrong. He didn’t know why Rose was here, but he had no business pawing at her in her sleep. The longer he stayed here in bed, the stronger those urges would become until he would eventually succumb. He simply didn’t have the same control over this human body as he did his time lord self. It seemed all this body wanted to do was procreate constantly and it was becoming rather tedious.

Although he loathed to do it, he carefully disentangled himself from the woman beside him, moving slowly as not to wake her. He slid out of bed and stood watching her. It seemed she was wearing an oversized T-shirt that nearly reached her knees, but there was no way of telling what was beneath it. An evil voice in his head whispered that perhaps she wore nothing at all and if that was the case, it was practically an invitation to pounce and explore what she had left uncovered.

Abruptly he turned on his heel, refusing to let his lecherous train of thought go any further. His room had its own small toilet and attached shower and it was there that he practically fled. He grabbed his toothbrush and squeezed an unusually generous dollop of toothpaste on it before beginning to rush his teeth vigorously. 

Why was Rose in his bed? Why would she do this to him when she knew he was completely, madly, foolishly in love with her? Hadn’t she just said that he was not her Doctor? It seemed rather odd that they would ignore each other for a week only to have her crawl into his bed for a cuddle. What did it mean? What did she want?

He glanced at his reflection in the mirror and discovered that all the toothpaste foam around his mouth made him look rather like a rabid dog. He supposed that was appropriate. He felt a little off his trolley as it was, but he would not let her torture him like this. He would march out there, wake her up, no matter how adorable she looked, and demand an explanation.

He rinsed his mouth, splashed some cold water on his face and emerged from the loo, only to have all his plans die at one look at her. 

There she was, sitting up in the tangle of sheets, rubbing the sleep from on eye with the back of her hand. Her blond hair stuck out at odd angles on one side of her head and her T-shirt hung askew, provocatively exposing one creamy shoulder. She was so cute, so sexy, and the Doctor could feel his single heart skip a beat at the sight of her.

She looked up at him and flashed him a sleepy smile.

“Hello Doctor, I’d wondered where you’d gone.”

Her sleep-raspy voice was positively delicious, and all his plans of firmly demanding an explanation of her actions flew out the window. All he could manage to choke out was a single word, “Why?”

“What’s that then?” she asked, cocking her head to the side quizzically.

Did she really have to be so damn adorable? It was making it very hard for him to form sentences.

“You…bed…why?”

“Oh,” she said, fidgeting with the edge of the sheet and suddenly looking rather embarrassed. “Well, Doctor…I missed you.”

“You…missed me,” he repeated, running his hand absent-mindedly through his already thoroughly disheveled hair. His mind struggled to process all the conflicted emotions that flowed through him. He was elated that she didn’t like being apart any more than he did, but also confused, frustrated and angry.

“I recall you stating quite clearly that I wasn’t your Doctor.”

He regretted his words the moment they left his mouth as her shy smile was immediately replaced by a crestfallen look.

“I know what I said was horrible,” she said softly. “And I’ve had a lot of time to think about how stupid I was. I lost you once Doctor and it hurt more than anything. I would be a bloody fool to push you away again.”

She looked so small and vulnerable in his great big bed. He wanted to run to her, to scoop her up in his arms and kiss her and love her and never let her go, but he didn’t think he could take the heartbreak if he caught her looking out the window again for a blue box containing a different Doctor. He had to be sure.

“Rose, you know how I feel about you, but I have to know that it’s me you’re wanting to spend the rest of your life with, not him.”

She gave him her signature smile where just the tip of her tongue showed between her teeth the one he was so in love with.

“Doctor, I want to find all the differences in you and fall in love with you all over again. I want to experience what makes you human, but talk about all the things we’ve done when you were a time lord. I want to help you build the new Tardis and explore this new universe with you, Doctor. I want us to grow old together among the stars.

“Oh Rose,” he breathed, closing the distance between them with a few long strides. Before he knew what he was doing he was on the bed kissing her the way they had kissed on the beach. It was all passion and desperation and those impossibly soft lips. His hands were in her hair, holding her still as he plundered her mouth and her fingers fluttered restlessly across his bare back. This was heaven and he should be satisfied, but his body ached for her. He was already painfully erect and the urges to strip off her T-shirt and have his way with her were stronger than ever.

He broke the kiss and climbed off the bed, turning away so she wouldn’t see the prominent tent in his pants.

“Doctor, what is it? Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” he sighed. “You’re brilliant. Kissing you is fantastic….”

After a moment of silence, she prompted, “But?”

“But this human body with all of its intense emotions is immensely hard to control. If I hadn’t stopped things I’m afraid things would have…progressed.”

He could hear the smile in her voice as she said, “Oh? What do you mean?”

He tipped his head back as he groaned. It figured the little minx would play these sort of games. Well then, he would give it to her straight.

“It means that ever since I’ve been in this body, I’ve wanted to shag you rotten,” he said, looking at her over his shoulder. “When I got those…er…urges in the Tardis, I could push them to the back of mind and they would stay there, but all I can think about is you and frankly, I don’t know how you humans get anything done if you’re all so randy all the time.”

Roses smile had blossomed into a grin.

“You wanted to shag me on the Tardis?” she asked clearly delighted at the prospect as she crawled to the edge of the bed.

His face colored slightly and he turned away, but she reached out and took his arm gently and pulled him back so he was facing her. To her credit, she didn’t let her eyes linger on the bulge in his pants.

“Yes Rose, I did,” he said, letting his eyes meet hers. She was so full of mirth and life and all the things his lonely soul needed, he had to restrain himself from bending to kiss her again.

“Well then Doctor, that makes two of us,” she said mischievously. “I’d always wondered if I was the only one wanting to jump your bones. It’s a relief that the feeling was mutual, yeah?”

She was tugging at his arm now, trying to pull him back onto the bed, and the Doctor was doing his best to resist. Although this was what he had dreamed of for ages, it all seemed to be moving so fast. He prided himself in being a gentleman and didn’t want to take advantage of her. He had imagined their first time surrounded by candlelight and rose petals after an evening of romance, not in his tangled sheets in the early morning light after a week long fight. 

“Rose, maybe we shouldn’t…” he tried to explain, but Rose rolled her eyes and fixed him with a serious look.

“Doctor, if we’ve both been wanting this for so long, don’t you think we’ve waited long enough?”

“I…well…” he said, his mouth opening and closing a few times as he struggled internally with himself. He wanted her so badly, but wouldn’t be able to live with himself if it turned out she had regrets. But what Rose wanted, Rose got, and he finally allowed himself to be pulled onto the bed and into another kiss, this one softer and sweeter than the first.

His resistance evaporated as her tongue coaxed its way into his mouth, stroking his rhythmically as her hands swept across his chest. He couldn’t help the growl that escaped the back of his throat and the noise seemed to make her bolder. Soon her fingers where threaded through his hair and she snogged him whole heartedly. The passion and desire he had been holding back for so long rushed forth in a biblical flood of emotion. Before he realized what he was doing, he had taken control, pressing her down into the pillows and crawling over her smaller form without ever breaking their kiss. His hands roved her perfect body, caressing the enticing curve of her breast over her T-shirt and feeling the hard buds of her nipples against his fingertips.

She arched into his touch and let out a soft whimper of pleasure. The sound went straight to his core, making his cock throb in his pants. His tore his mouth from hers and groaned against her neck. How could she drive him wild so easily? Never in all his centuries had he met a creature that could make him come undone like this. He was quickly losing control and the soft and gentle love making he had pictured for her would quickly deteriorate into frenzied, reckless fucking. She certainly deserved better than that.

“Rose,” he rasped against her soft skin, the scent of her alone edging him toward madness. “If we keep going, I won’t be able to keep control. I can’t promise things will go slow.”

“Doctor,” she replied, her voice made low and sultry by desire. “That’s what I’m hoping.”

He pulled away to meet her eyes and saw that she seemed to be amused by his torment.

“You said you’ve been wanting to shag me rotten,” she said, her lips stretching into a seductive smile. “You had better get to it.”

To emphasize her point, she untangled her fingers from his hair and trailed them down his back. She slipped beneath the elastic band of his jim jams to settle on his arse and gave a firm squeeze, sinking her nails into him just enough to get the message across that if he got a little rough, she wouldn’t necessarily mind.

He let out a gasp as electricity streaked through him, the scratching of her nails only heightening his desire. She smiled wolfishly before lifting her pelvis to grind against him, making it clear that she was in no mood for gentle lovemaking.

“Oh Rose,” he practically growled, elated that passionate, dirty, hungry side of him seemed to be just what she needed. He wasted no time in hiking her T-shirt up and over her head, leaving her in nothing but a pair of white, cotton knickers. There were understated and simple, but in that moment, nothing could have been sexier.

“Beautiful” he whispered as he let his eyes rove her exposed form.

Her full breasts heaved with every breath, the soft mounds capped with dusty pink nipples. His hands moved of their own accord, cupping, pinching, squeezing, and his mouth shortly followed. He latched on to one pink bud and began to suck hungrily, biting, nipping and delighting in all the wonderful sounds his ministrations produced. She squirmed beneath him, arching and sighing and letting his name escape her lips in a variety of breathless moans and trembling pleas, but she was soon impatient. Her hips bucked restlessly as he switched breasts, sucking hard enough to leave a purple mark on her pale skin. He was driven by the impulse to mark her, to make her his, but she was making it clear that the actions of his lips and tongue on her flushed skin was not enough. 

“Doctor,” she moaned, her voice tinged with frustration. “Need you…inside.”

 

As much as he wanted to spend his time exploring every inch of her body, he couldn’t deny her. The fact that his willpower was wearing thin was also a factor. He wriggled out of his pajamas and felt giddy as a schoolboy opening presents at Christmas as he hooked his thumbs into the waistband of her knickers and tugged them down.

She was absolute perfection, and as she kicked off her knickers the rest of the way and parted her thighs, he could see where dark, trim curls gave way to slick, pink flesh. 

“Doctor,” Rose said, the smile evident in her voice. “You’re staring.”

And how could he not? He was riveted to the sight of her sweet femininity. Rose however, with her usual boldness, wasn’t in the mood to be admired and instead grasped his hard length in her hand, giving him a few hard stroked before guiding him to her entrance. 

He couldn’t help the way he bucked into her hand, or the funny little grunt he made at the glorious friction of her hand, but before he could even process the sensation, her fingers left him and were replaced by slick heat as his blunt head pushed against her folds.

His eyes met hers and there stilled for just a moment at the precipice, the critical moment where they could stop this or where everything would change. His eyes searched hers and he was about to open his mouth to ask if this was really what she wanted. Before he could speak, she pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him. 

“You are all I want, and all I will ever want,” she reassured him. “But if you don’t shut up and start shagging me right now, I’m going to be very cross with you, yeah?”

And then her hands were on his arse again, urging him forward as she lifted her hips, forcing him inside of her amazing tightness. He groaned at the incredible feeling and all control was lost as he moved of his own will and pushed in to the hilt, sheathing himself fully. She whimpered his name and arched beneath him, and all his repressed need came rushing forth. 

He pulled back and slammed forward, pulled back, slammed forward, in movements that were almost animalistic. He might have had the decency to be ashamed at how rough he was being if Rose hadn’t been thriving on it. Her nails were digging into his buttocks, her hips meeting his with equal enthusiasm, delicious moans tumbling from her lips. The sight of her spread out beneath him with blond hair falling in messy waves over the pillow was the stuff his dreams were made of. Her perfect breasts bounced with every thrust, a sight made even more erotic when she arched her back in pleasure. He knew sex with Rose would be electric but he never knew it would be so wild, so sinfully heated.

Her body gripped him like a vice, pulsing around him, and despite their minimal foreplay, she was so wet for him that every thrust was accompanied by a deliciously naughty sound. He slid within her effortlessly, as if they were made to be together, and he knew that in this whole universe, among all the stars and planets and the billion races and the trillions of individuals, he had found his one true match.

She slung one bare leg over his hip and closed her eyes in ecstasy as the angle of their coupling changed. He could feel her hips continuing to lift, trying to meet his at almost a frenzied pace. He appreciated her enthusiasm but didn’t want this to be a race to the finish. He caught her hands which were still grabbing desperately at his rear and pinned them down on either side of her head. He pressed his chest to hers and buried his head in the crook of her neck and shoulder as he slowed his thrusts, but still filled her just as deeply.

“Doctor,” she whimpered, her hands flexing in a feeble attempt to get free, but her escape efforts dissolved into shivers as he began to suck at a pulse point on her neck, letting his teeth scrape over the tender flesh before soothing it with swipes of his tongue. 

His senses were filled with the sound and smell and feel and taste of her. Her sexuality surrounded him, seduced him. She was such a magnificent creature that he could scarcely believe she had chosen him, a broken and tormented man of a nearly extinct species. Not a day would go by where he wasn’t infinitely thankful for her, because with her, his broken soul had a chance of becoming whole again.

He sucked at her skin until it was purple and bruised, but she didn’t seem to mind. She was still restless beneath him. When he lifted his head to meet her eyes, he found that the hazel orbs were dark with desire. He was drawn to them, falling endlessly, and before he knew it, his mouth was crushed to hers and they were kissing hungrily. In the back of his mind, he had the sense to be thankful that he had taken the chance to brush his teeth this morning.

When the need for oxygen became too much, his lips left hers, his hips never faltering in their steady rhythm. Once again Rose flexed and squirmed beneath him, seeming to seek even deeper contact with him. Instinctively, the Doctor knew just what to do.

Releasing her hands, he drew back until his body was free of hers, earning a frustrated cry from his lover. He chuckled at her impatience while simultaneously loving the eagerness and vivaciousness that were her trademarks.

He lifted her legs, letting her ankles rest on his shoulders. He then realigned their bodies and leaned forward to give her another kiss, bending her nearly double as her knees touched her shoulders.

“Doctor, are you about to do something rather kinky?” Rose asked with a smirk, but all her cheekiness couldn’t cover up the breathless excitement in her voice.

“I figured that if we are gong to do this, I better give you a proper shagging then, shouldn’t I?” he said with a playful waggle of his eyebrows. 

He kissed her again, but this time it was a gentle meeting of lips and tongue, more love than lust as he said with touch what he lacked the words for.

“I must say,” he rasped when they parted. “I find your flexibility enchanting.”

“I bet you’d like it more if you were inside of me,” she whispered seductively, clearly not satisfied by his throbbing length merely rubbing against her aching sex. 

“Rose Tyler, you are insatiable,” he growled, knowing he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

He slipped a hand between then to guild his hardness to where they both needed it and then slowly, gently, he began to push forward. His hands braced themselves on either side of her head as he lifted himself enough so as not to crush her. Her toes were now alongside her ears in a stunning display of flexibility, and if she was in any sort of discomfort, it was quickly forgotten as he pushed inside her deeper than he had ever been before.

“Oh!” she gasped in delight as he began to move in slow, deep strokes, and the Doctor couldn’t help his own heated groan. She felt incredible, her slick walls rippling around him, and he soon picked up the pass, driving into her hard and fast.

Her small hands fisted in the sheets, her moans a beautiful song of “oh Doctor,” “oh yes,” and “oh God!” When he shifted slightly and hit a new place inside her, her eyes rolled back in the most satisfying way. In this moment, she was his, wholly and completely. There was no one else she was thinking of, not even his other self. 

Her moans were spiraling higher in pitch, and if the way she was growing tighter around him was any indication, she was nearing her peak. His guess was confirmed when she panted, “So close...”

“I want to watch you,” he whispered, eager to see the fantasy he had conjured in his head a hundred times play out for real beneath him. So many times he had pictured her mid orgasm, her pink skin aglow and her face contorted in pleasure. But now, here among the scent of sex and sweat, with damp flesh gliding against flesh, he knew his fantasies would pale in comparison to her true visage.

He thrust inside her once, twice, and then she was unraveling before him. Her eyes closed and those sinfully full lips parted in a silent cry. She released the sheets and grasped his forearms in a shivering grip as she spasmed beneath him. Her body clenched around him in the most delicious way as she became impossibly wet, nearly driving him over the edge along with her, but he clenched his jaw and slowed his thrusts, determined to hang on and watch her ride out the waves of pleasure.

She writhed and trembled and made the most wonderful sounds. He took in every detail, wanting to remember every strand of blonde hair, every breathless moan. He had seen countless stars, watched them destroyed and created, but this, his Rose coming undone beneath him, dwarfed them all in wondrous beauty. 

Gradually, she came down from her high and the Doctor stilled inside her to let her catch her breath. Her eyes fluttered open and she greeted him with a sleepy, if not wholly satisfied smile.

“That was bloody fantastic,” she breathed, her chest still heaving between them as she tried to slow her racing heart. 

The Doctor chuckled as he smoothed away a lock of hair that had stuck to her forehead. “I don’t think those words do it justice but I suppose they’re close.”

He dipped his head to kiss her, smiling against her lips as her muscles twitched and jumped when aftershocks rippled through her. He savored her flavor, letting his tongue glide along hers and might have went on to kiss her senseless if she hadn’t let out a slightly pained sound.

He pulled back and asked if she was alright to which rolled her eyes. 

“It’s not that I don’t appreciate your romance, Doctor, but you still have me folding in half, yeah?”

And indeed, her ankles were still pressed to her shoulders, trapped there by his weight atop her. He mumbled an embarrassed apology and pulled away, slipping free of her. He immediately missed the warm wetness of her, and his cock was still rock hard and aching to resume their love making. No sooner had Rose untangled her limbs did she find herself rolled onto her side with the Doctor kneeling behind her.

“Oi, what are you-” but then he was lifting her top leg and slinging it over one arm as he moved to center himself between the juncture of her legs and she knew what she meant to do.

She gasped his name as his blunt head ran over her slick folds. She was still rather sensitive and the sensation made her shiver.

“You didn’t think I was done with you yet, did you?” he chuckled, making sure he was covered in her natural lubrication before pushing just the head inside. “I told you if we were going to do this, I’d shag you properly.”

And then he was pushing forward and this new angle was glorious. Judging by Rose’s pleasure cry, she was inclined to agree. The position gave her little leverage, leaving her helpless to do more than simply enjoy what was being done to her. 

His thrusts were slow and even, mindful of this new position and how she was still sensitive after her previous release, but soon she was clawing at the sheets and doing her best to press back against him, seeking deeper penetration. Apparently his Rose liked to play a little rough in the bedroom.

He continued to tease her, filling her deeply but not at the frantic pace she desired. Soon her moans were interwoven with desperate pleas, for him to move faster, harder. Her cries were half muffled as she buried her face in a pillow, but he could still hear her requests for more, chanted like a mantra, and the Doctor decided he rather liked it when Rose begged.

His free hand gripped her hip, steadying her as he surged forward with more force, pounding into her just like she had requested. Her moans immediately escalated into screams, a sound he didn’t think he would ever tire of.

As much as he wanted this to last for hours, he was reaching his limit. To his credit, he hadn’t copulated for quite some time, ages to be exact, and never before in this complicated metacrisis body. His endurance wasn’t quite what it was in his pure time lord form, but he was quite sure Rose would be willing to let him practice until he was up to his usual standard.

She was already clenching around him as she neared her second orgasm and this time, he didn’t think he could avoid following her over the edge.

He pushed her knee back to her shoulder, once again marveling at just how flexible she was, and once she held her leg there on her own, used his free hand to reach between them. His skilled fingers found her clit and began to rub teasing circles around the sensitive tissue. That was all it took to send her head long into wave after wave of orgasmic convulsions.

Most of he screams were muffled by the pillow she buried her face in, but he could still make out his name, and if he wasn’t mistaken, quite an impressive stream of profanities as well. Her body was strung tight as piano wire as she shivered and shook beneath him, feminine walls squeezing him mercilessly until he had no choice but to erupt. His vision darkened to a pinpoint as he experienced what was the most intense orgasm of his long life, his essence emptying into her in spurt after spurt until he ran completely dry.

Gracelessly, he collapsed atop her in a heaving pile of limbs. For a long moment, they stayed that way, bodies interwoven to the point where it was hard to tell where one stopped and the other began. Although exhausted, the doctor’s heart was filled to bursting with joy, unadulterated euphoria, and a love so strong for Rose, he could hardly bear it. With the last of his strength, he gathered her into his arms and held her tightly, smiling against her hair as she hummed in contentment.

It was funny how the universe worked sometimes. Yesterday, he’d still been in the longest row he’d ever had with Rose, yet today they had taken the crucial step from mates to lovers. Their impromptu romp had left him exhausted and he felt himself slipping towards sleep, yet he was afraid that if he succumbed, he’d awake to find it had all been just a dream.

Rose saved him the trouble of fighting sleep by wriggling out of his grasp, stretching languidly as she padded to the bathroom. He couldn’t help but admire her delicious backside as she walked away. A moment later he heard the toilet flush and the shower turn on, and Rose stuck her head out to ask him if he cared to join her, her lips quirked in a mischievous grin.

The thought of lathering up her nude body was too tantalizing to pass up, and he wasted no time throwing off the covers and swinging his legs over the bed Rose giggled and ducked back inside, stepping into the already steamy shower.

As he followed her inside, he didn’t mind at all that his shower was rather cramped when occupied by two people. In fact, he realized that in this moment, there was no place he would rather be. Now that Rose had made it clear that she had accepted his human form, he could completely embrace this version of himself as well. A huge weight had been lifted and he fund he was rather looking forward to having only one life to live.


End file.
